Thought I Had a Bad Week

Thought I was having a really bad week. Some people have said some not-very-nice things about me. My feelings have been deeply hurt...and it's kind of hard to hurt my feelings.

A girl I went to summer camp with for years turned 40 today and also found out the tumor in her breast is malignant. Her mother died of breast cancer when we were about 13.

Another friend has lost much of what he owns to a fire.

A church member is in the hospital getting fluid drained off of his heart and having dialysis so that his body can continue to function.

I still own my bad week. Even if you can name 100 people who are worse off than you are, it doesn't mean that what is happening to you doesn't hurt or isn't difficult. But being present to what is happening around you and what is going on with other people instead of retreating into your own trauma/drama sure does make a difference.

Words to Live By

I have not been an avid blogger as of late. I have had a wonderful opportunity o write a weekly column that appears in several papers in the Little Rock area. Between coming up with ideas for a sermon and a column each week, my blog well has been running dry.

However, tonight, after doing some cleaning out in my house, I found a notebook that I kept in my twenties to collect quotes that I liked--from people I know, from people on tv, from movies, etc. I share some of them here.

The worst moment in an athiest's life is the moment when he is thankful but has no one to thank. --unkown

If you want to be your own person, learn to think for yourself. If you want an "A" in the class, learn to think like the professor. --Anne Russ

There are three things I have always loved and never understood--music, art and women. --Le Bovier de Fontenelle

I'm trying to find myself. I don't know what that means, but by parents are buying it, so I'm sticking with that. --Russ Gorman following our freshman year of college

Never eat anything orange, unless it is an orange, a carrot or a sweet potato. --Anne Russ

It's been my experience that no matter where you go, there you are. --Suzanne Sugarbaker

Why is easy listening so hard to listen to?--random comedian

Men learn to love the women they're attracted to and women become attracted to the men they love--Andie McDowell

If you have a college degree, you can be certain of one thing. You have a college degree. --Dr. Robert Anthony

I have yet to hear a man ask for advice on how to combine a marriage and a career. --Gloria Steinham (she said this 30 years ago and it still stands today!)

Nobody is happy all the time. If we were, we wouldn't be human, we'd be game show hosts.--Winona Rider in Heathers

Beware of men who cry. It's true that men who cry are sensitive to and in touch with feelings, but the only feelings they tend to be in touch with or sensitive to are their own.--Nora Ephron

According the Washington Post, Dan Quayle thinks Roe vs Wade are alternate ways of crossing the Ptomac.--A. Whitney Brown

Prejudice is the most ridiculous thing on earth. There are so many good reasons to hate people on an individual basis. -J.J. Wall

And my personal fav:

Life is kind to people who aren't cursed with self-awareness--Susan Sarandon in Bull Durham

Buy Something July

Now that we're back in buying mode (and considering re-imposing the ban), daughter has bought her first pair of vintage shoes. She got a good deal on them because the shop owner was having a difficult time finding someone with feet that small. They are great pair of black boots, circa 1960-something. People must have had smaller feet back then, because hers are little.

Her comment on vintage/re-sale clothing? "It's like hand-me-downs that you pay for." And we talked about how buying "gently worn" clothes makes for good stewardship as well as good fashion sense.

I am enjoying my upgraded I-pod. My workouts are better and longer. My house is cleaner. And I am generally more relaxed this week than I have been since the old one quit. When I start to get distressed by how dependent I am on an I-pod, I just put on my headphones and listen to the latest podcast of This American Life. I even sent them a donation when I realized what a calming effect the voice of Ira Glass has on me. I need to help keep them on the air.

Last Day of Buy Nothing June

Well, we made it. Not sure how much of a lasting impression it will make on the daughter. She is already planning everything she wants to buy. And to be fair, I will be at Best Buy tomorrow to obtain a new I-pod and cannot wait. In many ways, Buy-Nothing-June been a nice break, and we all feel good about the donation to the World Wildlife Federation. In other ways, it hasn't been easy.

For me, in spite of a lovely break in Oklahoma with friends, June has been a really hard month. I have been surprised to realize how often after a bad day or a bad experience, that the idea of buying something to make myself feel better crops into my head. And how it just made the day worse to realize that I couldn't buy something. I don't think of myself as a "shopalholic" nor do I spend a lot of my time shopping, but apparently, I do turn to consumerist activities for comfort from time to time. It's never a major purchase--a kitchen gadget, a fun t-shirt from Target, a new pair of shoes--but I hadn't realized before June how often I "comfort shop". I actually almost caved after an incident yesterday, but realized that nothing I could buy would make my hurt feelings any better.

I haven't been able to turn to food for comfort either, as I am trying to drop some extra pounds. So without consumerism or food to turn to for comfort, I was forced to up-level my prayer life. I have to say that prayer does not give me the instant gratification of a pound bag of almond m and m's or a new pair of shoes, but its effects are much longer lasting and build over time.

Now if I can only remember this as we move in to July and beyond.

Buy Nothing June Marches On

In spite of my I-pod withdrawal, I am actually enjoying buy-nothing-June. It's nice to go somewhere with daughter and not have to go through "can I have? can I have? can we buy? can we get?" I'm not sure yet how we will transition back into the "buying" months and still maintain some of the restraint we have shown this month. We may need to strictly define what she needs to pay for out of allowance and for what we will foot the bill. Although, now that she's moving into tween-ville, those lines get even more blurred.

We have had to stretch a couple of times over and above the I-pod incident. Our two porches are in dire need of a power wash, but a hose down will have to do for now. Skip has had to give up his Saturday scratch ticket ritual. Daughter is pretty low on summer clothes now that school uniform time is over, so I have do laundry more often to make sure she has something clean to wear. I may be sporting a more natural look as the month wears on and my make-up supply runs out. At the risk of TMI, I am sloughing off summer skin with a homemade concoction of sugar and olive oil because my body scrub ran out a week ago. For the good of the family, I did purchase some heavy-duty hair conditioner to keep the tangles out of tender-headed daughter's sun and chlorine damaged hair. I decided that was a necessity.

I wish I could somehow tabulate the amount of time I have gotten back these last two weeks by not stopping here and there to pick up this and that. Add to that the time saved by not looking through sales flyers or e-mail specials, and I may gain a whole day of my life back in this one month.

Money saved. Time saved. Must remember this. Daughter has decided that the money saved this month should go to the World Wildlife Fund to help save endangered species.

Buy

Buy

Oil Spill Influenced Dream

I had a weird dream last night I can only attribute to all the damage done by the BP oil spill. I've been following all the damage that oil spill is and will be doing and reflecting on how my own dependence on fossil fuel helped contribute to this disaster. Skip and I have already decided that when I am ready to move on from my 2003 Toyota Matrix, we will replace it with an electric car. I have just been wondering how much abuse our earth can take before we completely destroy her.

So last night I had this dream. We were in our house, but it didn't look like our house. It was worn out and dilapidated. And all the houses in our Wisteria-Lane-look-a-like neighborhood looked the same way. Almost like an abandoned neighborhood, but everyone was still living here. In real life, we have a dining room table that we bought when we first got married and it's a little worse for the wear, but we really like it. In the dream, that table completely collapsed and we needed to replace it. So my husband and I had a very calm, reasonable conversation about whether or not we should spend the money on a new table when it was likely that the earth would not be able to sustain human life for very much longer. Did we really need a new table or could we make do without one until the world came to an end? About that time, I woke up, so I don't know what we decided about the table.

I think we all have this idea that even with all the talk of climate change and pollution, the earth will continue to absorb all of the abuse for many, many years to come. But if we keep causing these massive disasters, we're going to speed up the destruction. Mother earth can only take so much. Hoping for better dreams tonight. Last night's was a little too creepy.

Wouldn't You Know it?

Just 8 days into Buy-Nothing-June, my I-pod dies. Gone. No coming back. It is a testament to the Apple brand that it has lasted this long. It's old school--a third generation Nano. I've had it for two-and-a-half years and have long since gotten my money's worth.

Of course, it is ironic that in an effort to curb my daughter's addiction to buying, I am now having to face my I-pod addiction. Not too long ago, I misplaced it for awhile and was completely out of sorts without it. I listen to pod-casts of NPR shows while I'm doing house chores. I have music for when I exercise. I listen to audio books while I knit or fold laundry or do rote things like log all the church member's contact info into a new database program (still no church secretary).

Now exercise is torture. Housework is even more of a drag. Yesterday, my daughter was kind of annoyed that I had the stereo on while I was making dinner. It clashed with her television show (she is loving the tv freedom that comes when school is not in session). I told her she was welcome to turn off the tv at anytime.

So, I suppose, I'll have to get used to more time with my own thoughts running through my head instead of Carl Castle's voice or the latest from the Black Eyed Peas.

Buy Nothing June

After a long hiatus from this blog, I am back to talk about Buy Nothing June.

Find us on Facebook.

While both my husband and I are certainly guilty of often buying things we don't really need, we declared this consumer-free month to combat our daughter's growing obsession with obtaining more and more things. She has hardly enjoyed the wonderful gifts she received recently for her birthday because she is already looking ahead to what she can buy next. We're not sure how this happened. Skip and I are not big "thing" people. Our spending downfall is experiences--travel and entertainment. Vacations and concerts and theater eat up a lot of money that might be better spent elsewhere. But we have a really good time. :)

We have a great house, but our home is furnished--not decorated. My engagement ring is the only valuable piece of jewelry we own. I have a $10 cell phone. If someone broke in to our house to steal something, they'd be so disappointed by our ten-year-old stereo and square-box 36-inch television, they'd probably spray paint something out of spite. I regularly haul things we aren't using or have outgrown to Goodwill, so we're just not sure where our child got this fixation with stuff and more stuff.

Since she's still too young to send off on a mission trip to Appalachia or Mexico (a great way to gain a little perspective), we thought we'd just put an end to the consuming. She actually cried when I told her. I have a nine-year-old who had a breakdown at the thought of not being able to buy anything for a month. Let's hear it for my parenting skills.

We've told her at the end of the month, she can decide where we will donate the money we have saved by curtailing our spending habits. I hope this month is effective. Otherwise, we may have to send her to the convent. Do they take pre-teen Presbyterians?

Indian Premiere League--Cricket

This is how they open up a cricket championship game in India. Love it!



Did I mention we have the Cricket Ticket through DirecTV so we don't miss a thing

Is Evian the key?

My 40th birthday is just around the corner. Should I buy a case today?

Right for all the Wrong Reasons

The death penalty has been in the news for the last few days here in Arkansas. A couple of cases have been called in to question and executions have been delayed. So it’s got me thinking about the death penalty, and I am against it.

There are a number of good reasons to be against the death penalty:

1. Life is sacred and should be protected at all costs
2. It is an arbitrary punishment. Two people can commit identical crimes and one may be sentenced to death while the other gets life in prison
3. There is no way to take it back if evidence later proves the person was innocent.

So there are lots of legitimate and even admirable reasons to be against the death penalty. Alas, my reasons may be as legitimate, but perhaps not very admirable.

I am against the death penalty because the people who receive it are the very worst example of humankind. They have destroyed not only the lives of the people they killed, but often the lives of everyone who ever loved their victim(s). The ripple effect of the destruction that occurs in the commission of a violent crime is impossible to measure.

But I also believe in a loving and merciful God. I believe that there is nothing that we can do that can separate us from the love of God. I don’t believe that heaven will be my home because of anything I have done, but because of what God has done through Jesus Christ. I believe that everyone, no matter what s/he has done, has the opportunity to receive forgiveness from God.

God is all loving and forgiving, but I am not. I think that people who have done irreparable damage to this world should have to hang around this life for a while before they get a shot at the next. Since I’m not a believer in purgatory, I like the idea of some prison-time limbo imposed here on earth. I really want them to have a taste of hell before they get a chance at heaven. Not very admirable or loving or forgiving of me.

I just may be the most mean-spirited anti-death penalty advocate around. I believe it's wrong to kill, but I'm okay with certain people being miserable. Not my best moment, is it?

Box Writing

My daughter starts taking the Benchmark test today in school. For weeks, they've been preparing for these tests. It seems like everything has revolved around them. And part of the prep has been learning how to write their answers to certain questions inside a box so that the tests can be graded properly. I can't believe I send my child to a learning institution where they are teaching here--training her!--to write inside the box. Drives me absolutely up a wall.

I don't claim to know anything about education, but I can't see the benefit of these standardized tests--other than to provide some statistics for the school districts. I would much rather that she was learning how to solve problems and figuring out new ways of making things work. I supposed my education wasn't much different, but after three years of International school exposure, the world of bubble filling, box writing and endless worksheets just doesn't seem very effective.

Hopefully, her time in Argenta will help counteract this training. I'm pretty sure most of the people who live there don't even know that there is a box--much less how to stay inside the lines.

Why Do I Feel Like GM's story will be the PCUSA story...

...but without the bailout?

This American Life ran a story this week about the GM Nummi plant closing. It traces why GM--even with the benefit of Japanese manufacturing "secrets"--was still unable to change and survive.

It parallels much of what is happening in the PCUSA (and I'm sure other mainline) churches today.

Resistance to change
Belief that the company would never fold
Too long to obtain the critical mass of leadership who believed change was the answer
Employees who didn't want to take ownership of projects or be responsible for making things better
Lack of support from corporate for divisions who were trying to do things differently


This American Life

If you're reading more than a week after the post, you may need to go to the Previous Stories link and look for Nummi.

My New Fav Song

Jaron and the Long Road to Love

You know we've all thought this!

Monticello

Went to Thomas Jefferson's home today. For those of you dealing with home construction or renovation, take comfort in the knowledge that Jefferson took 40 years to complete Monticello because he kept changing his mind! Courtesy of friend Adam's Uncle Paul, we got access to the Dome Room (or the observatory) that only about 200 people a year get to see. The stair case is too narrow to accommodate a large volume of visitors each year, so it is restricted to special guests. And we got to be special today!

Another great part of the visit was the kids' area at the visitors center. They had replicas of all the things you couldn't touch, use or sit on in the real Monticello available for hands-on activity. We got to sit in the chairs, use the polygraph writing machine like the one Jefferson used to copy his many letters and even lie on a replica of his bed!



Skip and Maddie with our guide in the Dome Room



All of us in the Dome Room



At the side entrance of Monticello



Maddie hard at work as a blacksmith

Jefferson was a man of many talents, but we were particularly impressed with his "10 Rules" for life.


Thomas Jefferson's Ten Rules

1. Never put off tomorrow what you can do today.
2. Never trouble another for what you can do yourself.
3. Never spend your money before you have earned it.
4. Never buy what you don't want because it is cheap.
5. Pride costs more than hunger, thirst and cold.
6. We seldom repent of having eaten too little.
7. Nothing is troublesome that we do willingly.
8. How much pain the evils have cost us that never happened.
9. Take things always by the smooth handle.
10. When angry, count ten before you speak, if very angry, count a hundred.

Life and LOST

I've been really frustrated with the final series of LOST that started in February. This is the season in which the writers are supposed to wrap everything up, to answer all the questions, to finally make it all make sense. But all they've done is created more questions and confusions. I've almost given up on it, but my husband keeps urging me to "keep the faith."

However, the last episode (spoiler alert) was a compelling tale of redemption. All of the characters right now are existing in dual realities. Each episode focuses on one particular character and allows us to see them in life on the island and in life is Oceanic Flight 815. Last week's episode was all about Benjamin Linus. On the island, he has been a leader--a devious one--but a leader nonetheless. In that life, he sacrifices his only daughter in order to save himself. In his parallel life, he is a powerless teacher--still devious. He has a chance to ruin the principal and take his job, but in order to do that he would have to derail the college dreams of his favorite student, Alex (his daughter in the island life dimension). This time, he sacrifices his own dream in order for hers to come true. Now it really didn't answer any of the BIG questions, but it was a nice story. And I almost missed it, because I was looking for answers to the big questions, not a tale of redemption.

It's a good life lesson for me. As I'm trying to make a go of it with this struggling little church, there are still not enough people in the pews or enough money in the bank. I can't seem to delegate out tasks and ministries like I should be doing, and there just don't seem to be enough hours in the day, even though I'm putting in a full-time week on a part-time salary. But instead of looking at the big picture, I should be paying attention to the tales of redemption going on all around this funky little historic church. People are finding a place to call home. People who have had no use for church in the past are starting to think about church differently. People are hearing stories from the Bible they've never heard before. People who have been shut out of churches in the past are finding a place to belong.

The writers of LOST have promised us answers. I'm going to believe them. The people who have kept First Pres going when every other church ditched downtown trust that God has plans for this church in this place. I'm going to believe them, too. I will continue to attempt not to measure success in BIPs (butts in pews), but rather look for DIFs (disciples in formation). It's all about the tales of redemption.

The Lost Has Been Found

Today, my husband found my I-pod. It had been missing for almost two weeks--even though I knew it was somewhere in the house. I am embarrassed and ashamed to admit how miserable the loss of the I-pod made my life.

The house is a bigger wreck than usual because I hate, hate, hate household chores. Only being able to plug in to the Wicked soundtrack or the latest installment of Wait! Wait! Don't Tell Me! makes them even begin to be bearable.

Plus, there is the block-out factor. My daughter doesn't get to watch TV during the week, so on the weekend she becomes a television addict. Glued to cartoons and Nickelodean pre-teen comedies in the playroom off the kitchen whenever she doesn't have something else going on. And my uber-sports fan of a husband keeps the television in the bedroom bouncing around between American football (okay, I know that's over for now), international soccer and cricket. My I-pod is often my only escape from the television noise of our weekend life, barring leaving the premises.

It has been an almost Herculean effort to exercise without music blasting between my ears. I bet my muscle-tone has already diminished and my BMI has increased by at least 2 points in the last 10 days.

I know what you're thinking. It's not a good sign that being left alone with my thoughts has just about driven me crazy, but it's really not as bad as it sounds. There are times when I can be silent and open to how my mind is working and what God may be trying to tell me--but only when I can really be silent. I do that in my car or on those rare occasions when I'm home alone or am up (like tonight) after everyone else is asleep or before they wake up in the morning.

I realize that everyone's lives are chaotic. But some of us deal with that chaos better than others. Trying to juggle being an urban pastor and a suburban mom overwhelms me quite frequently. Very rarely do I get the chance to go on silent retreat. But I can plug in those headphones and block out everything else for a period of time while I fold laundry or mop floors and not answer the phone or check e-mails. Quite often a three-minute Christine Kane song does me a lot more good than a three-minute prayer. I'm hoping God is okay with that. I suspect she is.

Facebook Interaction

Below is a friend's post and my reply to that post and another person's reply to my reply. I guess those 90 graduate seminary hours and almost 10 years in the ministry just haven't done it for me. Cracks me up!

Christy Cox Slyby "A womans heart should be so hidden in Christ that a man should have to seek him first to find her." Author Unknown
about an hour ago · Comment · Like
Derrick Templeton likes this.

Derrick Templeton Love that! (tear)
about an hour ago

Anne Russ I take issue with this. Why would anyone's heart be "hidden" in Christ? And so many people find Jesus through other people (a recent poll suggests that 75 percent of new Christians came to Christ through a friend or relative) that a man is much more likely to find Him because of a woman than he is to find a woman because of Jesus. It's good for a greeting card, but it's not very good theology. Aren't you glad I'm your friend? My arms hurt.
about an hour ago ·

Christy Cox Slyby Anne, you make me laugh.
42 minutes ago

Robin Lindsey Butler I sooo love this!!!@ Anne..as you grow in your knowledge of Christ..this statement will make more sense to you!!!
11 minutes ago

The Devil is in the Stained Glass

Wow. I've really let this go. Been a very busy Lenten season. Not so much because it's Lent, but because it's been busy.

There's a big hole in the hand-painted, valued-at-$350,000 stained glass window in the sanctuary at church. Actually the whole window is bowing in and is in danger of collapsing out into the street. We have one grant to hep with repairs in the sanctuary, but it's not enough, so we're using that grant to (hopefully) leverage another one. But we won't know about the grant until June, so we're going to have to board up the window to protect it until then. And to add to the whole deal, we have to sign an easement over to the historical society giving the grant. Shouldn't be a big deal, but since the Presbytery owns our property, they have to sign off on the whole thing--which, of course, makes it all a big deal.

So here's the thing. I'm am coming to hate this beautiful, stained glass window. It is sucking up resources of time and money right and left, and it won't do one damn thing to let the people of NLR know that God loves them. I've been meeting the people of Argenta, and I can't see them walking by that window and thinking, "Hey, I've really got to check this place out!" I hope I'm wrong. God has used stranger things than stained glass to communicate with people. I was just reflecting with someone yesterday about the people God places in our path. Perhaps this whole stained glass ordeal will end up putting our church smack dab in the middle of someone's path. I really hope so. Because we could sell that window and fix just about everything else in the church. Killing me!

Went to a great funeral yesterday for the Rev. Dr. Tom Logue. There was a man with a calling. In spite of a number of personal tragedies, he continued reaching out to people and sharing the Good News in a way that they could hear for over 60 years. The tributes given at his service were funny ( he was a funny man) and poignant. The number of lives he touched can't even begin to be calculated. My dad did a great job with his part. Although, he left out my favorite Tom Logue story, which involves Tom being convinced at a funeral (or maybe a visitation) when he couldn't find his glasses that the man in the casket was wearing them. Perhaps dad thought he couldn't get through the telling without cracking up himself. I wonder if Dr. Logue ever had to deal with a stained glass window?

My Lenten discipline marches on. Sadly, it has not been all that difficult to assemble of a bag of stuff per day to get rid of. Although, a couple of bags have just been trash from some of Maddie's "project areas". Have had to double up a couple of times when I just haven't been home long enough to do it on certain days, and will be doubling all of next week because of upcoming vacation. When I did this before in Germany, we knew we were moving to London, so there was a purging as well as an accumulating of things we wanted to have from Germany. So I couldn't really see the difference in the house. But I wonder this time, if I will see a difference or feel "lighter" by the time Lent is over. Maybe I should learn to be like Dr. Logue and not buy anything new until the old (shoes, pants, whatever) have holes.

This is Really Good

I love Bill Nighy

Ministry on Spec

Contractors build on spec all the time. They invest time and money into a home, planning that they will eventually turn a profit when the house sells.

Perhaps this will the new model for re-building churches that have experienced decline.

It's worked at Pulaski Heights Presbyterian Church in Little Rock. Not being able to call a full-time pastor several years ago, they called a well-qualified pastor who came in at well below the "going rate" because he had family reasons for wanting to be in Little Rock. Three years later, the leadership of this skilled pastor has brought the church to a place where they can install him as a full-time pastor.

I have taken another under-funded position at First Pres in Argenta, believing that this is the right time for this congregation to be re-born. The idea of it going under without having a chance to give it one last try with a regular (if not full-time) pastor was just not acceptable. Plus, I have a husband with an income.

Now our denomination has halted their program for church transformation--meaning aid for existing churches trying to make a comeback. So other than local Presbytery money, there will be no place for churches who can no longer afford a pastor to get financial assistance. It's a chicken and egg issue. How can a church transform without a pastor and how can a church in need of transformation afford a pastor? So maybe the Spec Pastor is the answer.

But how many pastors are out there who can actually afford or even want to work "on spec"? Unlike the contractor, you never actually recoup your initial investment (you don't get back pay). The best you can hope for is that one day, the church will be able to sustain a full-time pastor. Most pastors come out of seminary owing money on school loans. Others are supporting a family on a single salary. The potential spec pastor population isn't nearly large enough to serve those churches who do indeed have the potential to make a come back.

Perhaps that could be a new program for our denomination. To match churches who seem to have a chance to be re-born--meaning the potential to be self-sustaining in a few years if only they could afford a full-time pastor--with pastors who have the kind of entrepreneurial spirit to help bring a church back to life. And then supplement the pastor's salary on a descending level over a period of three-to-five years. Not only might it serve to bring churches back to life, it would also demonstrate our denomination's appreciation of our pastors' skills and our churches' witness.

Lenten Discipline

This year, I decided to adopt my friend Jon Arnold's "invention" of disposing of a bag of stuff each day of Lent. 40 bags of stuff in 40 days. It can be stuff to be thrown away, recycled, donated or gifted to friends. These are plastic grocery sack-size bags--not garbage bags. I suppose if you have a serious hoarding problem, the garbage bag might be in order. But for folks like me, who are merely disorganized, a grocery bag is do-able and helpful.

Thus far, I've gathered a bag of trash (expired medicines, make-up and sunscreens, along with empty bottles of lotions and potions) from the bathroom, a bag of books, a bag of linens, a bag of magazines (to be recycled) and a bag of kitchen stuff.

My daughter wanted to know what my bags have to do with church and God. I reminded her how much time I spend looking for things and how stressed out I get when I can't find things. "Do you think that's really how God wants me to spend my time? Don't you think God has better plans for me? And that maybe if I spend less time looking for stuff, I could spend more time doing the things God would like for me to do." She seemed down with that. Although I think she doubts that simply removing 40 bags of stuff from the house will keep me from loosing track of things.

Time will tell. Hope everyone is having a transformative Lent.

Polity Exhausts Me

Boy, I've really let this whole blog thing slide, huh?

Just got back from a two-day Presbytery meeting and am really worn out. I try really hard to get it, but I just don't.

We talk about change and revitalization in our churches, but when we gather as a Presbytery, we worship like it's 1952. Wouldn't such gatherings be a great time to model new and creative worship experiences? But no. That's not what we do.

And at a time when so many of our smaller churches could really benefit (and potentially grow) from having a full-time pastor, we boast about not tapping into more than 5% of our endowment in order to make the budget, rather than accessing some money to give struggling churches a boost or to plant new churches. And if you're not big on new and growing churches, don't we have some responsibility to help those in need during these tough economic times? Shouldn't we pull out a little more in this particular year to help the least of these? What exactly are we saving all that money for? Is that really good stewardship? Have we not all read the parable of the talents?

And I'm not even understanding the rationale behind what we do spend our money on. Maumelle, Arkansas is a booming community and we still don't have a Presbyterian presence there. For years, several folks have been trying to get an NCD out in Ferndale and were shut down. Now the Methodists are tearing it up just down the road from our Presbyterian camp. Yet, everyone seems very excited about a new church development in Northwest Arkansas targeted to the Hispanic population. If I understood the report today, it began in 2006 and they now have 30 members. Is that really what we're shooting for? Four years and 30 people? I feel like I'm just missing something.

I am, however, a big fan of our new moderator, Debbi Freeman and our new General Presbyter, Bill Galbraith. I really want to be hopeful about our denomination, but I'm having a hard time getting there right now.

What Three Women Can Tell Us

Three women have owned the pop culture media coverage over the past six months--Beyonce, Taylor Swift and Sandra Bullock.

Beyonce and Swift forged a connection at the MTV video awards after that now-famous incident in which Kanye West stormed the stage during Taylor Swift's acceptance speech and announced that Beyonce had "the best video of all time." Later, Beyonce turned over her acceptance speech time to Taylor. The Grammy awards were just a back-and-forth between the two women. The song of the year was the much-imitated and spoofed "Put a Ring on It". My daughter's spring dance recital routine is choreographed to the version of that song that the "Chipettes" recorded. Swift's songs are all about what you might think songs written by teenager would be about--heartbreak and young love. I think her song Fifteen should be required listening for every girl in America before she enters high school.

Bullock has rocked the world of every cinema snob in America, as her portrayal of an evangelical Christian mom in "The Blindside" has won her the Golden Globe, the SAG award and an Oscar nomination. The movie is even up for a Best Picture Oscar.

All three of these women have reputations for being nice people who are easy to work with and gracious to those around them. They don't throw tantrums. They all appear to be a little overwhelmed by the attention and grateful for the success they enjoy. The songs of Beyonce and Swift tell stories--about hearts broken, young love, strong women and getting even. We like these songs because we've lived them. They speak to us. And they are catchy and easy to sing. "The Blindside" sucks us all into the true story of a woman and family who changed the life of a young man. It encourages us to believe that we, too, can make a difference. That we, too, have to power to change lives.

What the soaring popularity of these three women and their stories tells me as a pastor is that now is not the time to preach sermons on the doctrine of predestination or the theology of atonement. Now is the time to tell stories. Those stories from the Bible that touch is because we realize that the people in them are like us. They are faithful, but flawed, people. We like these stories because we think that if God could use them, perhaps God could use us as well.

Now is not the time to plan a massive Bach Cantata for Easter, but to sing the songs that those who always been churched have known forever and to teach new songs that are easy to sing and to understand for those who have only recently joined the party. This is not a "dumbing down" of the Gospel. I really dislike that term. How can you dumb down the message that God loves us? It's not all that complicated to begin with, although many people work very hard to make it seem that way.

The last year has been a difficult one for many people in our country. Good people who tell stories that seem like our stories are our champions. We have chosen heroes who look like us and make us believe we might be able to take part in saving the world as well. If that can't clue us in on how to be the church at this particular place in time, then we just aren't paying attention.

Are Your Kids Signed up for Camp?

Crisis Commons--Very Cool

One of Skip's buddies from college is working as a volunteer on this project called Crisis Commons that is bringing together information technology people to work on projects to help bring relief to the people of Haiti. They gather at Crisis Camps and develop programs and applications that facilitate better communication, distribution and medical resources to the people of Haiti.

Crisis Commons

Our friend is working on this Pict-O-Speak app that will use Droids and I-Phones to share pictures for people who speak different languages to communicate with one another. Dave has logged hours coding (something he doesn't do much of anymore) to get this up and running for aid workers and others to use in Haiti. Very cool.

Wiki Pict-O-Speak

Getting Ready for Lent

If you're trying to decide what do for Lent--whether it's giving up something or taking up a discipline--check out this blog post from my friend John Arnold.

27 Days

Great ideas for a transformative Lenten season

Praying for Haiti

Sometimes we are forced into prayer. In those times when we feel helpless, when there aren't any immediate actions we can take, we are forced into prayer, simply because we can't do anything else.

The crisis in Haiti is so beyond our reach.

We text our donations to the Red Cross or send our money to Presbyterian Disaster assistance or other agencies, but it seems like a drop in the bucket.

We can't get in our cars or vans and drive to Haiti like so many did after 9/11 or Hurricane Katrina so that we can help.

We can't even begin to gather clothing and blankets and other supplies because there is not way to get them to the people who need them right now.

We are simply forced into prayer because we cannot think of anything else to do for the people of Haiti today. So often we act first and pray later. Perhaps Haiti will be our opportunity to reverse that order in future situations.

But while we pray, we can acknowledge that the disaster in Haiti is a disaster of such incredible proportions because of the extreme poverty that exists there. And poverty is something we can take action against every day in our own towns and communities. It exists in our own backyards.

Super Bowl Sunday is coming up. It's a great time to collect cans of soup (for Souper Bowl Sunday) and donate them to a local food pantry. All of them are running low on supplies these days

Go ahead and collect those clothes and blankets and get them to your local shelter or half-way house.

Think about how we all might spend less and share more.

Perhaps we can "pray globally" and act locally. And through that combination begin to carve our a more peaceful and just world.


We pray for Haiti

God of compassion
please watch over the people of Haiti,
and weave out of these terrible happenings
wonders of goodness and grace.
Surround those who have been affected by tragedy
with a sense of your present love,
and hold them in faith.
Though they are lost in grief,
may they find you and be comforted.
Guide us as a church
to find ways of providing assistance
that heal wounds and provide hope.
Help us to remember that when one of your children suffers
we all suffer;
through Jesus Christ who was dead, but lives
and rules this world with you. Amen.

— Bruce Reyes-Chow, Gradye Parsons and Linda Valentin

Two Great Articles

One is from Christianity Today on the Myth of the Perfect Parent. It particularly addresses the notion (a false one) that there is a formula for raising a Christian child. It's really interesting and I think comforting for parents whose children have not embraced the faith as much as the parents had hoped.

Myth of the Perfect Parent

The other one is from the Utne Reader and is about how creating things with our hands improves critical thinking skills and our sense of self-worth.

Crafting a New World


Now I'm waiting on the article on how learning to create things with our hands can help us to connect with our Creator.

Woke up this morning craving an egg sandwich. When I was in college, Murrell's (somehow I don't thing that's the right spelling) was a 24-hour diner. It closed at the end of July of this year. Back in the day, you could get a fried egg sandwich at Murrell's for one dollar. An egg between two slices of toasted white bread with mayo and sliced pickles. Today's version was made on wheat toast and with light mayo, but it still tasted great. I offered one to my daughter, but she couldn't seem to grasp the wonder of it.

Perhaps I was longing for the days when I just lived in a trashed dorm room and didn't have a house to maintain. A house that I can't update or decorate because my husband and I can't agree on colors to paint or what should go where. So nothing is happening. I think I will just focus on painting and putting together my office at church where I can do whatever I want and am armed with a gift certificate from Paint Depot.

Maddie is all geared up to start selling Girl Scout cookies. Dieters beware. Maddie is coming to sell you some Thin Mints and Samoas. The good news is that the won't actually be here until later in February, so you still have time to meet those New Year's resolutions.

Great article in the DemGaz on our church today. I even liked the picture of me--which is a miracle in itself. Here is the link, but you may need an account with the paper in order to view it. We have had amazingly good fortune in the last few weeks. Makes me think that perhaps God is up to something and hope that I am up for whatever it is God is up to!

Art of Renewal

"Faith is what you do between the last time you experienced God and the next time you experience God." -- Renita J. Weems, writer, minister, and professor of Old Testament studies at Vanderbilt University Divinity School.

I've been looking at the story of Jacob this week and realizing how that first powerful encounter with God at Bethel really didn't do much to change Jacob. He acknowledges a holy encounter and even marks the spot with a stone, but he continues a life a self-service and trickery. It's not until the man/angel/God wrestles with him all night and physically injures him that he is changed.

Most of us don't get those vivid, in-your-face, up-close-and-personal kind of experiences with God. We experience God in worship, in nature, through helping others, through allowing ourselves to be helped. But I really like the idea of faith being what you do in between those experiences. That our faith is about how we live in light of our experience and encounters with God.

I wonder if anyone will ever figure out a formula for God-encounters and spiritual growth. You know, like the average person has to quit smoking seven times before they quit for good. Does the average person need at least seven experiences with God before they move to the next level in their spiritual growth? Who are the people who grow faster, and who are the ones who, despite encounter after encounter, simply stay where they are? And how many of us are like Jacob and have to be injured before we can move on to a better place?

Here's hoping we all have an encounter with the Holy today that will sustain us and feed us until the next one.

I want to be like this guy

When a bunch of people were stuck in the Newark airport because of a security issue that shut down a whole terminal for about 5 hours, a traveling guitar player led everyone in a sing-a-long. Cool.